The Unavailable Man

Lets face it ladies, when it comes to actually getting into a relationship sometimes the chase can be better then the end result. We all at some point or another have totally fallen head over heels for the unavailable man. He can be unavailable emotionally or physically but either way there is some type of a roadblock there. Now with women today being more competitive and trying to prove a point most see the unavailable man and think, “challenge accepted”. This thought is completely detrimental to your well-being ladies! Believe me thinking game on when it comes to getting a man will cause more heartache than anticipated.

            Going after the unavailable man will literally drive you to madness. While he does seem perfect and worth any risk once this unattainable thing is conquered, the truth comes out and what seemed like a charming little quirk quickly becomes a non-negotiable flaw. The unavailable man can be met anywhere at anytime. It can be in class, at a bar, or even in line at the caf. There is a certain quality this man has that draws you in and then suddenly he shows a tough side and has some extreme barriers. As women we want to break them down, make him vulnerable, and most importantly make him ours. In this quest for the unavailable man we are willing to push aside girl code and traditional games for a no rules all out war, including tactical battle plan. Nothing is off limits and sometimes drastic measures are taken in an attempt to make this man available to you.

            Let me tell you something, the unavailable man usually has some pretty strong reasons for his current state. By digging up the past you might discover some stuff that you were not expecting. Men usually are not open with their emotional baggage or quick to tell you the brutal truth about emotional scars; in fact they might even deny their existence. Other times his emotional unavailability is purely due to the fact that he is an ass who is incapable of a functional honest relationship at this time. Do not beat yourself up thinking “if I had been different” or “I should have been able to be the exception, not the rule”. The latter was created by the unavailable man so women would take some of the blame for the relationship not working out.

            As a collegiate woman nearing the end of my 4 years, I have to tell you that the appeal of the unavailable man has decreased. In my earlier days I would have spent months (I hate to admit it but in some cases years!) chasing down the unavailable man hoping that I could change him. Now at the age of 22 I have discovered having an available and emotionally mature man is way more appealing. In order to have a functional healthy relationship both parties need to be equally invested and make the work and reward worth it for their partner! But, if you are seeking only fun, game, and potential heartbreak the unavailable man might be the exact pastime you seek.